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I spent my younger years in a constant battle within myself...

 

I was addicted to self sabotage, to substance abuse, to unrealistic health & beauty perfection standards, to toxic situations, to being liked, to methods of spiritual bypass and to be completely honest, a small part of me was even addicted to a deep feeling of personal victimisation that I had adopted as a part of my identity after moving through my fair share of toxic/abusive situations & relationships (Cue typical Pisces sun martyrdom)

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 I had a serious patriarchal wound living within my heart that manifested as the deep need to keep pushing myself past my limits, to do as much as I could humanly do in a day to feel worthy and to continue striving and striving for a life that I never truly wanted

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In simple terms, I never EVER felt good enough in anything that I did and the circumstances of my life reflected that belief entirely...

 

I was addicted to focusing on the needs of everybody else around me with little regard for myself

 

 I lived as though others knew what was best for me better than I did and I chose to listen to the people around me rather than to the divine wisdom of my sacred inner voice

 

This, over the years caused me to move through many dark periods of substance abuse, self isolation, self - loathing, chronic anxiety, suicide ideation and painfully deep depression

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I had no genuine inner self confidence and a very limited sense of ego based self awareness which stopped me from going after the things in life that I truly loved and wanted, instead choosing to give my power away to jobs, to beliefs and to partners that were draining my precious life force energy

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It took me until I was around 24 years old to finally gain enough self confidence within to cut & release the cords that were holding me hostage to a life and to situations that were never in service to my highest calling and to begin jumping off the cliff, out of my comfort zone and into the slow movement towards a brand new life... a life that would be led to me by Spirit​

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It was time for me to step out of the comfortable bubble my 7th House Taurus South Node had created for me and to step into the fiery flames of death & rebirth that my 1st House North Node in Scorpio was yearning for...​

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Even though the physical act of actually leaving everything I knew & thought I loved behind scared the absolute living shit out of me

 

When I was younger, throughout my teenage years and early twenties, I could not trust or believe in myself or in my abilities for the life of me and I was constantly left dismissing myself and my relationship with spirituality for others at the expense of myself 

 

I was often left questioning my sanity, embracing toxic relationships, suffering through eating disorders/food obsessions, health problems and addictions, whilst working myself to the ground in dead end jobs that got me nowhere and that I absolutely hated 

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I always felt like something was "off" inside of me, even as a child, but over time, I had convinced even myself that there was nothing I should worry about and that I was a generally a very happy person...

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I had no idea that there was so much hidden pain, anger, rage, trauma and built up resentment lying beneath the surface of my smile, hiding within the deepest parts of  my heart, waiting to be unleashed the moment I finally allowed myself to actually go within and pull the trigger

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 Over time, I was struck by the harsh reality that my "happiness" was only  a temporary result of chronic spiritual bypass and a seriously unhealthy obsession with positive thinking

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I suppose that years ago, through the process of life, I had put on a mask to hide the scars  

and over time,

I had convinced even myself,

that the mask,

 was my own face

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Eventually I began an intense, messy and brutally agonising process of essentially bulldozing through every facet of my old life and all of my pre-conditioned ways of thinking & being

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I let go of people that I loved, animals I adored, places I called home, jobs that made me feel safe, habits that I was addicted to, ways of life I had grown accustomed to living and I let go of beliefs that I had harboured deep within myself for a long, long time that needed releasing

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I began to look at, feel and accept within me the deepest and the darkest, most wounded aspects, learning to lovingly accept and embrace myself for all that I am completely

 

 No matter how bad and no matter how ugly

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I finally allowed myself to meet face to face with my shadow self for the first time, and fuck me was she big, loud and pissed off that I'd ignored her for so damn long...

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In the spiritual community there tends to be a saying that goes "The bigger the light, the bigger the shadow" and my goodness did that prove to be true for me

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My deep, dark, FEROCIOUS shadow finally came to the surface with an ugly vengeance in 2019 and for over two years I struggled to learn how to embrace her, to accept her, to love, to tame and to integrate her into my divine light

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I was healing through ALOT of pain, shame, guilt and trauma which I was really struggling to deal with and so throughout that process I became extremely toxic to be around with every relationship in my life deeply suffering

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However,

 

 It was only through the act of fully surrendering into the depths of that deep inner void space within me, through eventually allowing myself to express and experience my darkness for the first time without restriction and through the committed reclamation of my personal sovereignty, that I gained enough strength, courage, healing & wisdom to FINALLY BEGIN DOING AND SHARING MY LIGHTWORK WITH THE COLLECTIVE!!

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Previous to my healing journey, the thought of creating a happy life, without restriction, through my creativity, spiritual gifts & my deep connection with Source, had always felt like nothing but a far away pipe dream...

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As though it was destined for others but never for me

 

It was only within the loving arms of my healing shadow, my inner child, my angels, my ancestors,  Sophia God and with all of my spirit guides by my side, supporting me from beyond the veils, inspiring me to truly trust & believe in myself for the first time since I was a child, that I summoned the strength I needed to begin on the painful journey back home to my true self through my most recent, deepest and darkest, dark night of the soul healing journey

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How did you discover the power of Divination?

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I started using Tarot & Oracle cards during that painful period of my life where previous to being gifted my first set of Angel cards by a beloved friend around March of 2019, and in doing so, deciding to pick up my dads old Tarot deck for the first time

 

I had been a devoted Yogi 

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Yoga was my solace, my art, my lifeline, my connection to spirit and to myself and yet, for some reason, as I was moving through the deepest and darkest depression of my life, I couldn't connect to my practice at all, and In fact, honestly, I had begun to resent it 

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I couldn't connect with anything I had known and loved previously before at all

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None of my spiritual practices felt the same and I turned to substance absuse to get me through my days

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With my normal method of communing with Spirit gone, I didn't know where else to turn but to another form of communication

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One that I had never actually explored before...

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Divination

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Little did I know that spirit was leading me directly into my souls true mission, happiness & genuine purpose for this lifetime all along and that this intensely painful period of confusion, loss & suffering was truly a catalyst for my transformation, completely changing my entire life from the inside out...

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I was the caterpillar who had turned herself to mush and goo inside her chrysalis, KNOWING that when the time came I would emerge fully as a radiant and beautiful butterfly!​

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I began to use the cards more and more during my depression and they started to feel to me as though they were old friends I had known from lifetimes before

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I also developed a slight obsession with learning as much as I could about myself through the incredibly powerful study of Astrology

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I was beginning to find so much love, comfort and connection within the messages I received through the cards and through my study of the stars that I began to truly feel as though I was having my own, personal conversation with my higher self, my guides and to the whole universe, on a level unbeknownst to me before, and I began to understand myself on an entirely different level...

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My Spirit guides, my Galactic family, my Angels and my Ancestors began coming in stronger than ever to communicate with me more and more, and I couldn't ignore the truth of what I was feeling and experiencing all around me

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Exploring my connection with these cards felt really fucking important to my soul

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I had no idea or expectations around the amazing world Divination would open up for me and I had no idea of the healing powers they would allow for me to experience and to share with others...

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So as the cards and my learning of the stars proved the power of themselves to me over and over again without my trying

 

 I did what I do best,

 

 and I became obsessed...

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Like a moth to a lamp

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In the midst of my greatest and deepest of darkness, Sophia came to me and flicked on the light

 

I found Divination​

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I found Tarot​

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I studied Astrology

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I discovered a community I felt comfortable in

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My gifts began to activate

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I began learning to reeeaaally trust in myself & spirit

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I heard the call

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I worked on my confidence

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I realised the importance of my galactic & my human lineage and I began healing my Ancestral, my current life & my past lifetimes trauma

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My life finally began making sense,

 

 so did my suffering

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Over time, and after alot of inner work I began to experience true healing

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Only then was I finally courageous enough to answer the fucking call of Spirit....

 

For years I had felt so deeply ashamed of my never ending obsessions with the occult, with the esoteric, with aliens, with the strange, with the spiritual & the unconventional

 

 I tried to fit into societies box ticked "normal" and it always felt wrong, stifling and flat out depressing to my soul

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I had no idea where to find my place and nothing really ever felt as though it fit right

 

I felt as though I could blend in and fit basically everywhere but I had never felt in my heart, as though I truly fit in anywhere

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The path of a starseed can be lonely at times  

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It wasn't until I started working with the cards for myself, until I started learning about myself through Astrology, and then through accidentally stumbling upon a vibrant community of beautiful Tarot/oracle, energy readers and Astrologers online that my whole life began to really change and I knew with my whole body that I was moving into the direction of my souls highest alignment

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The amazing men & women I found online provided me with a community that felt safe, vibrant, wholesome, spiritual, creative and expansive

 

Finding them felt as though I was finally coming home

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 They offered me the love, light, truth and guidance I had been aching for to reignite a passion and a zest for life within me again that gave me the strength I needed to push through my darkness and to want to keep going with my life

 

I have created my business, my youtube channel, this website and all of my content in order to truly answer the call of spirit, following the whispers of my heart in honour of the support these incredible, divine souls I found online offered to me during my greatest time of need and to be that same light for others who may be going through a similar experience to my own

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What are your intentions for Crystalline Priestess? 

 

 

I am here now to act as a beacon of love, light, truth, hope and courage in what at the time may feel like a never- ending perpetual darkness to any and all of those called to my frequency

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My readings act as genuine activations for your soul to re-awaken and remember its true divine gifts, its power & its sovereignty in this intensely important human lifetime

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If you have been called to my vibration then you are ready to walk heart first through the fiery flames of internal death, rebirth & transformation in order to rise as the pheonix from the ashes of anything and everything that was never meant for you

 

You are ready to live freely, powerfully and fully as your happiest, healthiest and as the most embodied version of your beautifully abundant authentic self

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It is such an honour to be of service to the collective in this way

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It's changed my life and I know with all of my sovereign heart that it will change yours too

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What have you learned throughout this process?

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Throughout this journey Ive been working on learning to trust myself

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Coming from such a low level of self esteem, it took me quite a while to build enough courage & confidence within myself to begin giving personal Tarot readings, especially to folks I didn't already know

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I believe though, that Spirit never leads us down a path we're not meant for and if the desire to do something or to be of service in some way lives within your heart then it is there for a reason

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Starting this business has been a true testament to that for me

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At the beginning of 2021 I had never given a Tarot reading to a stranger in my life...

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Now giving my heart to strangers daily through readings is my greatest joy!

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3 Years ago if you had of told me I would be where I am now, living the life I am currently living I would have laughed in your face...

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Now Im just so fucking grateful

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I began healing myself and my entire ancestral line though finally choosing to celebrate the woman I that I naturally am and through loving the things about me that are unconventional, weird and that make me unique

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Its an ongoing process

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I am reclaiming myself for the men and women who came before me and who were silenced

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I am reclaiming myself for the men and women coming after me who's voices will be heard as a result of mine​

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As I liberate myself I liberate us all

 

This is how we break generational, ancestral & societal curses

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Im finally accepting myself fully for the woman that I inherently am

 

In all aspects

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And now I am here as a guide for you to do the same, in your own way, as you move through your own sweet souls journey

 

I am proud now of the blood that runs through my veins, of both my European and my Dharug roots

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 I won't be labelled in any way and put inside any kind of box

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Im here to build an entire fucking universe of my own
 

I no longer look at my feelings as a painful curse and I am now consciously choosing everyday to trust in the path that my heart is intuitively calling me toward

 

 I leave the conventions of our outdated society behind and I forge a new path ahead for myself, for the next generations and for all of my brothers and sisters in a "New Earth"

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We are the ones we've been waiting for 

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What changes have you experienced since committing to your healing journey?

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Nowdays, I am choosing to trade shame for confidence every single day and its been teaching me that spirit is always here for us, guiding us in every moment, throughout every step along our path and I'm learning that the more we choose ourselves, our truth, our light, our joy and our sovereignty, above anything and everything else, and for the highest good of all, the more we open ourselves to receiving all of the good this life truly has to offer us

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Contrary to what we've been taught, humans aren't actually here to just suffer, to slave our lives away in circumstances that breathe death into the spirit as opposed to life

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We weren't designed to live in a constant disconnection between ourselves and the divine

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And we weren't designed to live so divorced from nature, becoming so out of touch with the natural beauty and sweetness of our physical reality that we literally destroy our darling Mother Earth, the very being we rely on for life itself with little to no regard for anyone or anything else outside of our own gain.....

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My entire life has changed now because I chose to listen to my own heart instead of everyone else's for once

 

 Because I decided that I want to be the change i'm seeking in this world as opposed to continuously wasting my time waiting & hoping for somebody else to come along and do it for me

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And especially because I finally chose to listen to the call of spirit, because I finally chose to answer it, because I finally chose to trust in it and because I finally chose to follow it, even when It terrified the absolute fuck out of me and I was completely demonised by my unhealed self and by many others for doing so...

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I have learned now to simply trust in the messages that spirits calls forth through me

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I refuse to question myself anymore

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I refuse to hide myself anymore

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 I want you to know the same for yourself

 

This is what my message is all about

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 If you have been drawn to my vibration then you are here for a reason

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You too are awake and ready to remember 

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Thankyou for being here to witness my process of healing

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Where are you now? 

 

 

These days I am choosing to heal myself through doing what I love

 

To be of service to Sophia, to create, to guide people, to share love , to share light, to share my truth, hope, knowledge, wisdom and happiness with the world in order to build a sense of love and community through all of my content, but most importantly, through my energy

 

My mission is to help in healing any and all humans who may be or who have been in a similar space to where I have been throughout my past to rise up and empower themselves into the deep and powerful connection with source that only comes with living inside of your own personal sovereignty

 

To see through the illusion of their conditioning, of their fears, of this reality and to focus on healing themselves, releasing their past in order to reintegrate their unique heart into sovereign wholeness once again and to become the hero of their own incredible lives

 

Because, trust me, if I can, you can, and that's what we're here for 

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This is only just the beginning

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I am here as a reminder to you of how beautiful, special, unique and gifted you are and to highlight just how much this planet truly needs you right now  

 

No matter what your going through

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No matter how you feel

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No matter what you've done

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No matter who you are

 

If you are here then you have something special and unique to share with the world

 

Your personal sovereign key code is an integral aspect in this planets ascension 

 

Its time for you to embrace this entirely

 

 I see you

 

 I feel you

 

 I honour you

 

 I am a reflection of you

 

 All of my love and light 

 

Thankyou for being here and listening

 

I appreciate you

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   Crystal xx